“We only have 18 summers with our children, before they’re grown.⠀
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Sandy toes, sun drenched afternoons, the smell of citrus wafting through the air in the late evenings, falling asleep with the window open and the cool breeze cutting through the day’s heat… ⠀
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With Aimee, my oldest daughter, I only have 13 left. ⠀
She is officially starting Kindergarten this fall, and trust me, you will find me at her school’s gates as the puddle of tears gathers next to the gallon of hand sanitizer and cold coffee. ⠀
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After all, the summer of my last trimester when I was pregnant with her seems like it happened yesterday.⠀
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She was born August 31st at 10 in the morning. I had gone into labor around 9 pm the night before, after an evening stroll.
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I still remember the smell of her sweaty baby head against my chest. Her colicky cries that rang morning, afternoon, and night. My first summer as a brand new mama — petrified, confused, completely drunk on love and indescribable fatigue. ⠀
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The individual days felt longer than eternity, but when I look back, our moments with them never seem to last long enough. It never seems enough.
My journey into motherhood was an unexpected one. I was training to become a pastry chef and just beginning to reevaluate my professional aspirations and dreams when I had to make a decision to put everything on hold after finding out that I was pregnant. For years I felt a gnawing ache of resentment and bitterness for what I’ve had to give up …
These photographs are reminders for me that God does not give up on us, or our dreams. He has promised us good things, in His timing, even if at first we cannot see. We’d spent an afternoon picking lemons in this lemon grove, and went home to make macarons together. Although I would have never imagined sharing my passions with my own little family, here I am, 5 years later doing just that. I realize that instead of giving anything up, I’ve gained so much more.
Capturing motherhood fulfills me as an artist because becoming a mother was the transformative part of my own story. The relationship between a mother and her child is one of the most vulnerable relationships in this world. It’s raw, real, beautiful, meaningful, and at times, painful. Motherhood photography is taking something expected and everyday (a mother caring for her child) and bringing to light its signficance. To photograph a mother is to say that the moments of her life are ones that really matter. She matters.” Tiffany, Photographer and Mother in the Images
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